30 Aug Swingers: The Difference Between Swinging and Open Relationships
We took to Reddit to find out how experienced swingers distinguish the difference between swinging and open relationships.
Here’s what we found out!
Swingers: The Difference Between Swinging and Open Relationships
A married couple curious about opening their relationship asked the r/Swingers thread on Reddit –
“We’re a married couple and still hesitating to try new things, the first thing we’d like to figure out is the difference between open relationships and swinging. Anyone can help?”
Experienced swingers on the thread responded and we thought it would be beneficial and educational for you guys to see how actual, experienced swingers define the difference between swinging and open relationships.
Experienced Swinger #1:
“Open relationship,” much like “ethical non-monogamy” (ENM) or “consensual non-monogamy” (CNM), is just an umbrella term to describe any relationship that isn’t 100% monogamous through agreement from both partners.
“Swinging” is one of the many flavors of open relationships/ENM/CNM, and it essentially means emotional/relationship monogamy with sexual non-monogamy. I’d guess swinging is the most common type of open relationship.
Another common type is polyamory, which involves both emotional and sexual non-monogamy (i.e., people can have multiple romantic partners, and it can be hierarchical or non-hierarchical).
Experienced Swinger #2:
Swinging isn’t an open relationship. It’s a team effort. Open implies individuality and autonomy.
Swingers who are same room no separate play are not autonomous. It’s not open. There is no room in the relationship emotionally or sexually for anyone else unless both parties are present.
Some swingers have open relationships. There is a crossover. Most don’t.
Experienced Swinger #3:
Swingers have clubs and parties that they go to, typically as a couple, to play with other couples.
In an open relationship, the partners typically date and have sex with others as free agents, though there is quite a bit of crossover.
Experienced Swinger #4:
Not sure if it’s the right definition- but, this is the way I’ve seen it:
Poly: you’re in love with multiple people, and have strong emotional ties with multiple partners. Sometimes group play with your main partner and/or partners – often alone with one of your partners.
Open: you only love your partner. Other relationships are only for sex and fun – but often there’s no group play. For example, you go see your boy/girlfriend on Thursday for a date, and your wife sees her boy/girlfriend on Sunday. Often, There’s often no group play and each partner usually meets with their boy/girlfriend on their own.
Swingers: you only love your partner (unlike poly). sex is for fun – but you share your sexual experiences together (not apart like in most open relationships).
Experienced Swinger #5:
Generally swinging is an activity you engage in as a couple. It’s a monogamous closed relationship where sex and friendship with other people is viewed as an activity to enhance the couple’s bond. People in Open relationships seek out sex and romance separately or together. It’s open to whatever.